Actual conversation at a party last night
Random college kid: Dude are you a real punk or a fake punk?
Me: I, um. I-I don't care?
Kid: *turns to his friend* Dude he said he doesn't care that means he's a real punk hi I'm Doug nice to meet you

Turtle dances while showering. [video]

straight people: Danimals is where the goodness of dairy meets delicious fun
gay people: right?! that stuff is such a good source of calcium AND vitamin D
straight people: it doesnt even have ant artificial stuf, or high fructose corn syrup. it's all natural
gay people: And they're full of delicious fruity flavor! That's why you'll feel good when your kids reach for Danimals!